Wise Woman Essence http://wisewomanessence.com come...retreat with me. Fri, 28 Jul 2017 21:00:03 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.9.9 The Courage to Recalibrate http://wisewomanessence.com/2017/07/28/the-courage-to-recalibrate/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2017/07/28/the-courage-to-recalibrate/#respond Fri, 28 Jul 2017 21:00:03 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=264 read more]]> I never thought that I would consider using the strange word ‘recalibrate’ as a part of my growth.  I never thought that courage could show up quietly.  And having so many years of living and experiences and failures and successes, and still finding myself sometimes not enough can be quite an uproarious moment out of time for me.

A thousand questions take over my mind, studies say 60,000 or so a day…too much.  “Get quiet!” I hear my grander self whisper. “Go outside and get in the dirt with your bare feet,” she smiles adoringly.  “Shhhhhhhh….sing and speak to the butterfly that shows her beautiful blue, the hummingbird that appears to think you are a flower for nectar, the dragonflies that escort you to the tiny created pond they think you made just for them.”

So here I sit at my computer with a calming glass of organic chardonnay …grateful for the delicious grapes that Mother Earth has gifted me in this way.  I ponder my week so busy outside playing with rock and flowers as I redesign and recreate my courtyard.  Courage told me I could landscape if I wanted to…gather ideas from Pinterest and magazines along with my own creative muse.

I found myself releasing those multitude of recurring thoughts, like the songs that constantly replay in my sleep and daily routines.  I found myself getting into getting dirty—my nails are not pretty; my face drips with perspiration; my feet have dirt engraved in my soles.  But I am happy and I am feeling different.  I am feeling a shift, changes; I am recalibrating!

That word—where have I heard it before?  I realized as a master electrician and natural mechanic and radio engineer, my daddy had used that very word quite often as he changed and upgraded technology, when technology wasn’t even in our society’s vocabulary!  I feel my daddy with me since passing quite a few years ago from Alzheimer’s.  He gives me signs—songs, phrases, rainbows, morse code through my cell and car radio….or I can just feel his smile and support.

Recalibrating….that’s where I am now.  I am loving it.   In my recalibration, I have to be honest.  I had to let go of perfection, the feeling of not being enough, that having to be in control and fix it, etc….If you are a woman, a woman with children, grandchildren, a baby boomer woman, you know exactly what I mean.

I am learning to honor the moment; I am learning to release old stories; I am learning to trust the future.  I am learning to pause, breathe, notice, be aware, walk away from the caught in the reactive and into the joy, the beauty, the loveliness, the stillness of the gift of my days.


It’s a magnificent awareness when I realize this is really happening.  I just have to tell you, this feels fabulous and delightful and miraculous!

Recalibration…just sayin’

(If I can do this, you, wise woman, can also!)


calibrate (something) again or differently.
“the sensors had to be recalibrated”

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Reciprocity http://wisewomanessence.com/2017/02/13/reciprocity/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2017/02/13/reciprocity/#respond Mon, 13 Feb 2017 22:22:25 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=250 read more]]> Having hibernated last winter, I realized that my plan for this wintertime didn’t honor my self-care time.  And what I discovered was this:  my body needed rest, and she was taking it, no matter what!   So ‘rest, read, journal’ became my new plan.  I would follow it to the ‘t’, except for a couple beautiful online courses, deliciously simple and ponderous, while connecting beautifully with other like women souls.

As a natural caregiver like most women are, it is easy to fall into forgetfulness. From plenty of experience, I knew that; but I had forgotten. Yes!  So it was very much like starting over, yet with a new skill set.  I didn’t have to go back to square one.  I knew what I needed to do!  Pause and notice.  Then focus with intention, making certain I was not hard on myself.   I observed myself to be not so easy rising in the mornings, having to push a little with yoga and walking.  I noticed myself  ‘done’  by afternoon and early to bed in the evening, leaving quite a few tasks and projects undone.  I felt fatigued; and I grieved that I was falling behind in my lifework.  So I took soft steps and gave myself permission to accomplish only  those pieces that soothed my soul, lifted my heart and moved my body.  Here’s what that looked like:

  • Walking with a good friend once a week.
  • Gentle yoga stretches early in the mornings.
  • Making certain I was hydrated and nourished appropriately.
  • Organic herbal teas and an occasional glass of organic wine.
  • Doctor checkups.
  • Allowing myself to rest and nap more.
  • Reading comforting fiction and nonfiction.
  • Online & actual connection with wise women groups that nurtured gently.
  • Checking in continuously to keep myself on my path, knowing it was so easy to fall out of alignment during this fragile time.
  • Loving kindness laced with breath work  seemed to move me back tenderly as needed.
  • Journalling, so much a part of my life for years, softly with ease and only what touched my soul deeply.

Once I got myself in gear for that winter season,  little synchronicities began to appear.  A beautiful journal Undone is beautiful There is beauty to be found in the middle of the mess (Michele Cushatt) showed up for me.  Perfect!   I discovered Renee Trudeau’s Nurturing the Soul of Your Family 10 Ways to Reconnect and Find Peace in Everyday Life.  Comfort food for the soul!  

A delightful planner/journal by Breathe (UK) found its way to my hands that would allow me to easily play more with my scheduled and unscheduled events—-a softer way for me to get through my mundane to-do’s and my creative tasks as well during my cocreated moments of winter down time.  I had given up strict calendar time and list keeping years ago, so I was a bit challenged at first until I grabbed my colored markers, pencils and stickies for collaging my way through my days and weeks of these winter months.

I connected.  I brought in my new word for the year 2017 and replaced last year’s  2016 word “Elysian: divinely inspired” to “Reciprocity: harmony and balance through giving and receiving“.  And I knew I could do this.  Winter and I could and would honor each other.

“What was all that about?” I asked.  A soft whisper slid in behind with, ” following the seasonal cycles, you are” with a smile.  I realized I was.  I was no longer in a hurry.  My body said “absolutely not”.  The small woman in me no longer had to feel guilty or worry.  So I took a deep releasing breath to listen.

 My soft feminine said,

“For this winter

breathe into your playwork

through your moments out of time,

as they are kinder to your body and your soul,

 your heart and your mind.”

And then her query for me, ” Where’s your journal?  It’s time.”

I realized I would be living one of my favorite Rumi quotes now:

“Out beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing,

there is a field…

I’ll meet you there.”

Yes, I will.

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Where Love Is… http://wisewomanessence.com/2016/01/18/where-love-is/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2016/01/18/where-love-is/#respond Tue, 19 Jan 2016 04:32:25 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=243 read more]]> I think there is a milestone of accomplishment when all our children are all of a sudden married, in their own homes, with careers and/or babies and puppies.  I reflect the past year—a whirlwind of sorts…everyone moving into a new home or back to an old one—that’s four homes!  Two weddings and a refresh of a marriage of many years—that’s three major marriage events! I call this year an all inclusive, aside from the normal holidays and birthdays and anniversaries.

Change and transition, major energy had shown up for all of us.  Exciting yet exhausting!  So much so, I felt the wheels of life moving on without me.  Slow motion as I watched, feeling I wasn’t able to keep up with all this lovely wonderment.  What had happened to me?  I metaphorically was continuously having to pick myself up, put on faster shoes, and grab my hydrating thermos!

I realized I needed to make some internal changes very quickly.  In order to fill my chalice with all this beautiful newness, I had to empty the constant flooding of  overflow with life past, life present, and life to be.  So I finally took my own suggestive guidance as retreat life coach and stepped out of myself for awhile.  Yes, I did.  Really!  I took a retreat, a sabbatical of sorts…laying aside all, except for important matters only with my family, my close friends and my self-care. 

 I created my days with only the most of the mundane daily practices.  I allowed Simplicity to back  me out of the busyness and overdoing for which I have always had a propensity…years and years and years.  I just stopped.  I absolutely did. I came to a sudden halt.  I pushed that pause button and left it on pause!  I decided it was time for me to take a breath, a deep breath, to  ponder and reflect on what I no longer needed in my life and what I really wanted in my life.  

I had to set with myself and my journal and my moments and begin a cleaning out of the years of buildup of my unconscious thoughts, words, actions, and habits that no longer brought me joy or peace or love.  I made three lists:  a ‘keeper’, a ‘giveaway’, and a ‘throwaway’!  Then I redid those lists over and over in my mind until I had pared down to days of just walking, just pondering, just admiring, just being grateful, just eating simple garden meals, just watching birds, just singing, just playing the piano, just watching fireflies with my husband, just swinging with grand babies, just being in the joy of where my daughters are in their lives with their loves.

My retreat, my sabbatical, my moment out of time had created itself.  I gently listened to the whispers, as Maya Angelou so wisely shared.   I bravely stepped up to the plate where I would make no choices that would render me undone in any way, ever again.  I created a most precious sacred space, a  breathtaking quiet place in my mind and in my heart, for me to delightfully notice surprising signs and amazing synchronicities with little miracles, sometimes big ones, that soothed my worried soul from oh so many years of busy, releasing me into a sweeter deeper place in which to live my life, my really beautiful life that I had forgotten to remember forever ago.  

 I gave myself permission to enter the sweetest space so indescribable and unbelievable!  With my retreat commitment, that beautiful sabbatical creation, I deliberately set out to see, hear and feel from my heart, as a child does.  Every day I took my hand and led the worn out me to loving kindness and compassionate play,  major components of self-care.  In that time, I found myself, and I remembered me.  I remembered the sweetness of life and love. I heard the birds singing; I felt the wind; I noticed the dragonflies and the butterflies and the fireflies. I observed the clouds in the sky—angel wings, feathers, faces, and puppies!  I enjoyed and savored lovely teas and great coffees and yummy wines.  I began to choose only to connect deeply with others…letting go of the old ‘how ya doin’ just fine’ and discuss living, the truth of it, with all its beauty and its sadness and its laughter.

I  learned to celebrate my time outs, to allow open space for creative play, to give myself permission to be strong in my vulnerable moments, to laugh, cry and breathe deep.  I have room now.  My chalice is refillable and renewable with the preciousness of all my dear life moments.  And I love, absolutely love, being there.     Compassion is there.  Wisdom is there.  Joy is there.  Peace is there.  Gratitude is there.  And so am I.

Where is that?   I am whispering to you now, “… where Love is. ”  

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And Quietness comes… http://wisewomanessence.com/2014/05/30/and-the-quietness-comes/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2014/05/30/and-the-quietness-comes/#respond Fri, 30 May 2014 19:02:19 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=230 read more]]>      These are the days—good days with good moments to honor. However, I’ve found that if I St. Thomas and retreatam not deliberate, conscious and focused, I can lose the day quickly. I can also lose myself quickly and end up wandering in my mind or in a continuous circle of going nowhere with a to do list that I am not fond of.
     So recently, I decided I really want to make the most of these spring and summer days, cherish the moments with my formula, H30, health—happiness—harmony, in my life. Of course for me that looks like ‘retreat’. What I have noticed since I made that recent query, I am intentionally deliberate, conscious and focused. It works.
     And, with that intention I move into a secret place where Quietness abides. According to A Course in Miracles, ‘in the quietness is where all things are answered and all problems resolved.”
     And that’s where I want to be. But getting there sometimes is a process. I may have to pay bills, vacuum my carpet, do laundry, go for a walk, take a shower…..I will be able to tell when I am ready….a calm energy seeps into my presence. The outside world is no longer in front of me and my thousand and one thoughts have slipped away. I may sit amidst my tiny flower garden,  a favorite park picnic table of a quiet beach moment in St. Thomas. I may read a passage of meditation. I may just recline on my comfortable sofa. I trust the moment.
     Once I arrive, I find I really don’t have to ask a question about anything of concern as Spirit already knows. The beauty of that wisdom brings a sweetness to my soul. I breathe into the moment, however many that may be throughout the day.
     I allow the ears of my heart to listen in the stillness. I really don’t have to work at it. It just happens. And the Quietness owns my sacred space. There is an energy there that moves in a mystical manner, releasing old thoughts as if cleaning out a drawer and rearranging and making room for new thoughts of directions and guidance.
     Sometimes the answers are immediate; sometimes I will have  already moved on to another moment in my day….and the answer appears, always loving and gentle and compassionate…sometimes with a little laugh.
     Quietness, you see, has a special way about Her….and She always has a gift for me. I love that! I am so grateful.  The beautiful book, The Feminine Face of God,  has this to share:  “Once you make a conscious choice to act on what you do know, the process of spiritual maturing begins.”  I believe that to be so with every breath of my being….

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a ‘wonder’ moment http://wisewomanessence.com/2013/04/01/a-wonder-moment/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2013/04/01/a-wonder-moment/#comments Tue, 02 Apr 2013 02:21:21 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=216 read more]]> Wow…the day after our family Easter wondermomentevent —so much fun and love and laughter and sharing and eating good food and playing with grand babies and grand puppies…and this time an Easter egg hunt, the first for the youngest almost two…She was trying to figure out what all the excitement was about, why the eggs, why they were hiding, and why should she want to find them.  Then she ‘got it’!  So precious…that ‘wonder’ moment!

Have you ever held an event where there was so much high energy and excitement — then when it was over—total surreal, so quiet…that’s how it was for me last evening!  Time came and went so quickly.  A whirlwind of love…then a breath so faint…a few tears for the great moments and goodbyes we shared.

Tonight I gave myself a ‘wonder’ moment of retreat…from all the past week of  Easter prep and readiness with house and food, making my list and checking it twice, or more–and losing the list a couple times.  Time to take a breath…time out…time for a lovely warm soak in the bath, just to take in the weekend as  I miss my babies tonight…so the best way for me to give myself compassionate self-care is this little moment of retreat.

This ‘wonder’ moment of retreat puts me in a deep place of gratitude and joy for my life.  It honors me as a mama and a grandmommie.  It honors my mama and my grandmothers. I am so blessed to have their wisdom passed down to me.  I know they were with us in spirit yesterday.  I could feel their love…and I wouldn’t be surprised that they were having a ‘wonder’ moment themselves!  Hmmmm, I wonder…



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Reflections II http://wisewomanessence.com/2013/01/22/reflections-ii/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2013/01/22/reflections-ii/#comments Tue, 22 Jan 2013 23:56:21 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=191 read more]]> I am just now reflecting on my holidays…most of the month of December I had the flu that wanted to hang out with me for quite a while.  I did not get my tree up until right before Christmas…highly unusual.  But it was what it was.  For Christmas Day, I felt fine.  Many family and friends for Christmas lunch…grandbabies and grand puppies everywhere.  By 5 pm that evening, everyone was gone, or down for a holiday nap.  I had gone ahead and cleaned up the holiday dishes and left overs.  I walked back into the living area and felt I needed to build a fire in the fireplace.  There was a hush…so very quiet and still.  I felt it deep to the core of me—a ‘lightness’ surrounded me.  I lit candles, took off my shoes, pulled up my quilt around me as I settled into my comfy sofa.  I was at that place of deep gratitude that all was well in that moment.  It was a beautiful feeling of awe and humility as if Grace had just spread Her lovely wings over me and whispered, “Merry Christmas, dear One.  You have done well.  Rest now.”  And, so I did…not without appreciating the fire, the holly cut that morning along with the magnolia, pine and spruce for the mantel…and such love for my family.  A very nice nap slid in.  If anyone had passed    by me, I am certain they would have found me asleep smiling.  For it had been some time since I felt the magnificence of such a moment.

quiet and calm night

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Reflections I http://wisewomanessence.com/2013/01/20/reflections-i/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2013/01/20/reflections-i/#respond Sun, 20 Jan 2013 18:13:39 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=185 read more]]> I was looking through my iphone photos recently and came across this lovely photo.  Here is the story behind the photo.  We as Wise Women have our stories that are important for reflection:

As a Wise WomanSoul, I am quite often alert to coincidences and synchronicities in my life now.  They remind me of the magical grand picture of life & living; and that there is much more to our moments & our days than meets the physical eye.

I had been out running errands.  Autumn had set in here at my Kentucky home.  Although it was gorgeous—the amazing palette of fall colors—I was feeling somewhat wistful at giving up my summer, my bare feet, my retreat swing near the springhouse and the warm breezes that seem to connect me to my Self and to Mother Earth.

I pulled up to where I now park, underneath a grand pine tree and between two Japanese red maples.  As I exited from my car, I was taken back by what I saw….all the beautiful deep red leaves of the maples had deposited themselves at my feet like a red carpet, inviting me just one more time to come to the swing at the bottom of the path and just ‘be’ for a little while.  I could feel ‘smiling’ as if Mother Earth was saying, ‘It’s not over yet. Come spend some time with Me…take a walk on this beautiful red carpet I have prepared especially for you.’red carpet 3

And, so I did.  I took the photo as a memory keeper for how Life speaks to us if we choose to be aware, to notice and to listen to the whispers.

Wise Woman, you can do this as synchronicity is etched deep into the essence of who you be.  Take the Walk of the Wise Woman with me.  You can do this.


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Take risks, Wise Woman… http://wisewomanessence.com/2012/12/04/take-risks-wise-woman/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2012/12/04/take-risks-wise-woman/#respond Tue, 04 Dec 2012 20:25:13 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=177 read more]]> Winter is coming on…The winter solstice is nearing.  I remember my mama not wanting winter to arrive.  I shared with her how Mother Earth sleeps during this time, allowing for her beauty rest to bring the magnificence of spring in March.  She smiled and commented, “I never though about it like that.”  I so miss my mama right now.  This photo is our last party together—my beautiful youngest daughter and I shared a Christmas tea party with lovely Ruthie—my dad always said “she was the prettiest woman he ever laid eyes on”!—right ’til he passed.  That’s what you call love.  Her gentleness and patience and kindness were all laced and woven into her physical beauty.  She taught me to take risks…I take them now in her honor.  How I wish I could just sit with her for a little while and listen to her wise woman wisdom.

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An August retreat moment of surprise & spontaneity… http://wisewomanessence.com/2012/08/23/an-august-retreat-moment-of-surprise-spontaneity/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2012/08/23/an-august-retreat-moment-of-surprise-spontaneity/#comments Thu, 23 Aug 2012 17:00:04 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=170 read more]]> Pondering how lovely this August is here in my little valley in Kentucky…feels like a September morn (Neal Diamond can sing this to me any time, my birthday month!)…I have just completed a conference call and follow my intuition to stretch and visit the outdoors….walking barefoot on the grass still damp and glistening with dew…feeling the hush of the breeze all around me.  It’s a slow walk with small steps, a breath here and there with the sunlight pouring down through all the shade dappled in my yard with my circle of very tall trees so full this time of year.  I gently step and ponder how Mother Nature is beginning her transition with late summer….I find myself near the front at a little bistro table, perfect time to sit and sit more…noticing where my little granddaughter has re-situated some gardens items for ‘her’ fairy garden, so sweet!  Her little countenance resembles the fairy pictures in books and glows when she is in her ‘fairy’ moment out of time.  I then notice my front courtyard back in the corner where I had moved the statue of Mother Mary as the Black Madonna—had been a sad empty corner that needed a little compassion and comfort.  I suddenly notice she is wearing a rose…how perfect, how lovely, how synchronistic, how spontaneous—no coincidences!

The Divine Feminine is always quietly sharing behind the scenes of life…we must be aware and take time to notice the offerings as we listen for the whispers of the beauty of our days…

It took me a while to remember and relearn how to do this.  Now I can’t live without doing this.  What about you, Wise Woman?  How is your August coming along?

A beautiful reminder of the feminine face of God…


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Journaling and the Way of the Wise Woman http://wisewomanessence.com/2012/06/18/journaling-and-the-way-of-the-wise-woman/ http://wisewomanessence.com/2012/06/18/journaling-and-the-way-of-the-wise-woman/#comments Tue, 19 Jun 2012 02:05:11 +0000 http://wisewomanessence.com/?p=140 read more]]> I have been loving the power of journaling.  And I have discovered that journaling has creative connective powers to the deepest part of who we are as wise women…Sometimes, I just write and write and write…other times I just ask questions, writing those down to ponder, to allow the answers to create themselves.  Sometimes, I cut and paste and draw and paint and mark and highlight, allowing my wise woman muse to take over.  Journaling is a retreat moment in itself…it calms, centers, creates a space where my intuition and insights begin to jump right onto the page.  I started out with the journal style of The Artist’s Way, but begin creating more with photos and cutouts from magazines and books with words, phrases and pictures that carry the essence of what I am searching for or what I am feeling or what I know I need to receive….Journaling gives me that safe space on paper to really be just me, no judgment or criticisms, no negativity—playful compassionate creative intuitive mystical magical moments create themselves in my journals…..

You can do this, Wise Woman.  Don’t be afraid to let your muse take over.  You may just find an ally supporting all your dreams and desires, leading you to your passion and your purpose…..and it’s such a magnificent experience once you allow yourself to get over the hump of actually writing down, drawing, painting, collage who you be…do you remember the Wise WomanSoul in you…come out and play…give yourself permission.  You can do this!

a quick journal moment!

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